The Thinking Jar

I found an old entry, at the back of one of my notebooks, the red one to be precise.

I think I wrote in September or July… I am not sure really…

—

Oddly enough

I am reluctant to remember

Oddly enough

It aches to forget

In my gut

An ice tells me of yearning

I want

I seek

But what?

There is unease

In my seeming silence

In my stillness

My insides whirl

There is searching

For an unknown state,

an anonymous solution

In my unspoken

Inexplicable disquiet

I see balance

I bask in my theoretical balance

Yet still I wept

—–

(hardly edited, the title to follow)

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