The Thinking Jar

i was too tired to argue with my lola. so i went to mass with her. i wore black, surprisingly she didn’t comment on it. I ended up reading from the Book of Wisdom (First reading today) and it was about condemning the one, I read it once before Mass started just to get a feel of the mood. It was a rather somber piece but I can’t really tell, it has yet to sink in and I doubt it would sink in unless I get to read a third time. The priest talked about Jung’s theory- about the superior/senior and the eternal child. I could relate, in one of these few instances where I feel like I connect to something "catholic", I felt my insides (take note, not my innards which have been cooking these past few… ) glow. he advised that we be child-like, we have become "senior" - success oriented. He recommended humor. He also talked about a "Lord anecdote" about the explanation of life, or perhaps lifespan… there was a dog, a cow and a monkey then man… nice choices for a life lesson story, eh?

anyway, it was nice. I can learn to like Sunday’s. Now, if only I could do that to the rest of the week…

.

Story- telling

And I would not have changed yesterday

And I still would have taken this life.

And I’d take the same steps with you

Knowing that thing won’t turn out right

Even Rapunzel lost her hair

And Prince Charming, his sight

Sleeping Beauty slept more than an hour or two

Snow White choked on an apple

In the Magic Mirror’s plain view

I believe in the power of stories

I even like fairy tales

In knowing we were doomed

I penned it already

But still we had to play out the tale

I believe in the pain of stories

And I hope like a fairy tale

Fingers crossed,

I pass this journey

Life lessons learned,

Still fail

Still hope

Still hope that we prevail

I know we were not meant to be

I already figured it out

But still hoped in this story

I just tried to find out

And here we are,

Looking at it,

Another “in retrospect”

I wince, amazed,

I didn’t saw it

Yet still no trace of regret

I had to live out the story

I had to find out

I knew yet still I went on,

I’m sorry

There was no backing out

You were so beautiful,

I marveled

With a mere handful of pain and regret

But still this road has to be traveled

Promise me you’d be well…

(a work in progress so don’t get too attached … )

I told my students yesterday to be cautious of doing such. Think about it -  When is a nudging meaningful and when is it a simple accident brought about by proximity? when is handflapping to "denote" a bird or when is it a self stim? when do we put too many words into actions and sounds that were not intended to mean anything.

perhaps we subconciously choose to put meanings we want to be there… 

read yourself again. "read what you wrote,"i said. read it and wonder if YOU got it; was your report faithful to what you really want to say?

i forgot to tell them to step back first, to stepback and look at it through lens that makes things looks farther, maybe fatter, a little lop-sided.

Reading

is good, of course. I’m an advocate. Then again, so is pacing, right, Lorenzo? And so is emptying the head, which children stop believing to be possible by the time they hit their decade-life crisis or so.

we read and we think and we mind. but a break from it all would be sensible, every now and then. to save our sanity and to keep us from being forced to go astray…. overreading is like putting words in one’s mouth, words wondering how (,through whose ears,) they wound up there. overeading puts thoughts in your head, thoughts that, they themselves, did  not intended to be there.

step back but think twice before completely pulling away…